Diary of a Married College Girl

When Brent and I first discussed wedding timing, there was one (seemingly) determining factor.

I was still in college.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

We got engaged in Februrary, knowing that I had one more semester until graduation. After considering the idea of a winter wedding I (being me) did not feel satisfied.

See, both of our birthdays are in December- a week a part- the 2nd and the 9th to be exact. Then comes Christmas.

I wanted to spread out my gift-getting. There was no way my anniversary was getting thrown in that mess.

[just kidding, kind of.]

So we decided to go for it, to have our wedding in August. I’d always much preferred summer weddings anyway.

All this meant one major thing- I had to figure out a schedule that would best fit my newly married lifestyle, AND figure out how to take five classes while trying to work.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The Lord never ceases to amaze me. Somehow [ with the help of my personal registrar’s office aka. my mom] I crammed two of the classes into my summer [hence the procrastination of wedding planning until about one month prior], translated my job at Chick-fil-A into a paid internship [6 credits worth], and found a night class that I liked in walking distance from our little home.

I had life figured out.

But let me tell you something, it is not the breeze I thought it would be.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Beyond the fact that I have to drop my best-wife-ever status on Thursdays and purchase [for the first time ever] boxed mac n cheese and Ramen noodles for my husband’s dinners…besides the fact that I rush out the door as he’s getting home from work and don’t get back until he’s either exhausted or watching the game…my MOST major struggle as a married college girl?

identity crisis

Who am I? I ask myself this at least once a week. [by week I might mean day]. I struggle with the pressure balance, of wanting to be home, of wanting to do well in school, of wanting to work more than I am, of remembering i’m a student, of the desire to live up to my degree.

This week was one of those struggle weeks, and as I struggled, I also reminisced.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

October 2010– Brent and I just broke up. I don’t know what to do, I don’t know who I am, and I ESPECIALLY don’t know why I’m here. I hate school, I don’t think I will ever graduate. I’m barely passing science, and I’m never ever there. I can’t stop crying and I feel so anxious- four more years is a lifetime. I’m never going to make it that far. At this rate I’ll be graduating in six years…and I have NO motivation to pick up the pace. Who cares about school. All I wanted was to get married and have a family-and my dream life just broke up with me. 

I hate this.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Three years ago I was a freshman at Millersville University. My high school love had just broken my heard, I hated education and thought going to class was for lame people, I wasn’t taking a full load of classes, therefore behind in graduating, and my parents actually reccommended I go to HACC-or put school on hold until I got my act together.

I couldn’t tell you when or what hit me. But somewhere in my journey I found my niche. I buckled down and took classes all year round. I worked ahead for no reason but my own self-drive, [and, little did I know, the Lord’s perfect plan].

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When I feel like I can’t make it through one more class, when I wonder what I’m doing with my life, what I will do with my life, I considere the contrast- October 2010 to October 2013. Same boy, same girl, same college, completely different story.

Sometimes I wonder why I ever doubt the Lord’s hand [working in my life].

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

***On a side note***

My stomach turns at the thought of all that dye in boxed mac n cheese. I was not cut out for this quick dinner stuff! SO, I found this awesome, quick and easy recipe-

Brent’s eating well tonight 🙂

Baked Mac & Cheese  

MacCheese-Dinner_opt

Ingredients

  • 8oz. Elbow Macaroni
  • 4 tablespoons Butter
  • 3 tablespoons Flour
  • 2 cups Milk
  • 1/2 teaspoon Salt
  • Dash of Pepper
  • 2 cups Cheese, shredded (I used Sharp, but any cheese that you like is fine)

Instructions

Prepare macaroni according to directions on box.

While the macaroni is cooking, prepare the cheese sauce.
  1. In a large saucepan, melt butter, add flour mixed with salt and pepper.
  2. Whisk until well combined, gradually add milk, whisking continually.
  3. Bring to boil and cook for 2 minutes, stirring constantly, reduce heat and cook about 10 minutes, until mixture is thick.
  4. Gradually add cheese and simmer until cheese sauce is smooth and thick, about 5 minutes.
  5. Fold in cooked macaroni.
  6. Place mixture in a 13 x 9 pan, and bake at 400 degrees for about 15 – 20 minutes until golden and bubbly.