I dedicate this post to the random five months we have been married. (Not six, or a year, but five).
Today I have a guest writer. Brent Hostetter has agreed to sit down with me and give his input on our lives over the past five months (It’s only fair that, if he thinks i’m embellishing anything which of course I never do, he add his own perspective).
So today, from the hearts of Brent & Katie Hostetter, I give you-
A Behind-the-Scenes Look at Our Less-Than-Perfect Life
(*Disclaimer* While these aspects of our lives may fit us as a couple, they don’t describe everyone, and that is perfectly ok (you’re probably better off that way 🙂 )
Let’s begin with my perspective (As the more experienced writer on this team, I get to go first. And as the girl too.)
1. The difference between 1-ply and 2-ply toilet paper. Because there is one, and it is crucial to some people’s comfort and happiness.
2. Men don’t like leftovers. Or to make it less of a generalization, a lot of men don’t prefer leftovers. (But we’re getting there. I’ve found that the old saying “Lasagna is always better the next day” really does apply in this situation. Is that an old saying?)
3. A dinner without meat is not an acceptable dinner. Period.
4. When I want to have a calendar meeting, I need to first guarantee that Brent is fully fed and hydrated. And in an excellent mood prior.
5. Discount gorcery stores are NOT as appealing to men as they are to women… (“You got that where? Is it stale or something?”) Please note***This also applies to Trader Joe’s, which did not impress Brent when I dragged him an hour to grocery shop.
6. Along the same lines, Brent will buy the first thing he sees. I will search seven stores and ten websites for the best deal before I end up buying the first thing I see.
7. When there is a good opportunity to buy food, packing lunch is never an option (Think day trip to Philly with a lunch box in my purse.)
8. Talking during a movie, sports game, or anything else projected on a TV screen? Impossible.
9. Although he IS my best friend, my husband is never going to be the one I curl up in front of chick flicks and drink hot cocoa with. (In other words, I need girls).
10. When he suggests a trip to the mall, he is picturing Chinese food and the gumball machine. NOT browsing Gap’s latest line.
11. On a more serious note- Marriage means everything in me is exposed. What I feel is what Brent feels. I have the power to set the mood for my house, and for my family. My problems are no longer just mine, he is fully affected by them. It is the best accountability but also the hardest. And Brent has been a major trooper through all of it.
12. In areas that I find sensitive, he values honesty over sugar coating. Think opinions on dinners, birthday gifts and my fashion sense. I’m not saying this is a bad thing, just a new thing. I admit I could benefit from more honesty on these subjects.
13. I’m continually blessed (and shocked) that when my face is invaded by breakouts and my eyes are puffy from tears, Brent still loves me, holds me and says that I’m gorgeous. And I can tell he means it.
14. Overall, I really do think that marriage is amazing. It’s this perfect balance of intense commitment and closeness, and the joy of living with my very best friend. (Even when that joy includes consistently reminding him to use air freshener in the bathroom).
And now, a few words from my guest writer (I am super impressed, not only at his writing ability but also at the fact that he mustered up TEN THINGS for me! 🙂 )
1. Girls aren’t as intrigued with poop as guys are.
2. Katie’s idea of a fun day includes day trips and shopping. Mine is relaxing. At our house.
3. I consider a snack to be a piece of cheesecake or a sandwich. Katie considers these to be “dinner spoiling foods” and prefers kale chips.
4. Women are creatures of ambiance and scents. I don’t want to tell you how much we spend on Glade plug-ins.
5. Events are a way bigger deal to my wife than they are to me. Parties and holidays are somehow the most exciting thing in the world.
6. It has been important for me to learn to love Katie in a way that speaks to HER not ME. Often that includes chocolate and coffee drinks.
7. Along that line- The same things that matter to you aren’t going to matter to her, and the same things that matter to her won’t always matter to you. Take time and listen.
8. Find something you enjoy doing together and do it. We love trying new recipes, entertaining, dreaming about the future, working out, and the occasional day trip.
9. The key to our marraige really is communcation. Sharing our hearts with each other is crucial. It’s easy to exist with your spouse, but that always lead to lifelessness, it seems.
10. Sometimes it’s best to just listen, not fix.
Ultimately, it’s the differences between us that make us love each other all the more. It’s the laughing and the fighting over big and little things that create relationships. Easy is definitely not an adjective of marriage, and sometimes “What am I doing?” is the only phrase that comes to mind. But doing life together- being real with one another- is the most pure form of relationship we can imagine.
Love, B + K
“Brent LET’S TAKE A PICTURE!”
“KATIE I’M DRIVING.”
Not-so-glamorous ending of our first Christmas tree.
Brent accompanies me to the treadmill section of the gym, only to watch ESPN. (Yes this was taken while running. And to his credit, he raced me at a six minute mile and I almost died right there).
In our pajamas. Enough said…